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Allegedly, we’re supposed to figure out what that purpose is (sure…easy), then go forth and conquer (wow, easier!).
But what if you have no idea what your purpose is?
One thing I can promise you: you’re not alone.
Ummm… I don’t freakin’ know! If I’m being 100% honest, I don’t know where I see myself next month, let alone 5 years from now.
Of course, I have bills and a family, so I wouldn’t dare utter those words. But they most certainly sum up how I feel.
I bet you’ve felt that way too. It’s a struggle most of us millennials face, no matter what route we decided to take post high-school.
Take those of us who graduated from college, for example.
We walked towards the platform with family cheering in the background, grasped that shiny Bachelor’s degree, and crossed over to the other side of the stage, where the real world was ready and waiting to snatch that smile right off our youthful, happy-tear-streaked faces.

We panicked and we went back to school.
On the surface, it may have been easy to justify that Master’s degree. But what about the reasons you were ashamed to say out loud?
* You had been in school all your life and didn’t know what else to do.
* You couldn’t find a job after graduation.
* Going back to school is what you’re “supposed” to do. Plus all your friends were doing it.
* You could avoid paying your student loans for a few more years.
We delayed the inevitable for 1-4 more years, hoping that this time around, we’d finally get our lives together.
No matter how you got to where you are, you may have found yourself here with the rest of us asking the same damn question…now what?
Pin me to come back to this post later!

I’m sharing these strategies with you in hopes that they’ll help you do the same.
6 steps to figuring out what to do with your life
1. Inventory your present.
Do you ever get so caught up in the business of life that you don’t have time to really evaluate your present situation?
Like because you’re so busy trying to make it all happen, you never take the time to process all the things that are happening to you and for you?
To get to where you want to go, you have to know where you are.
Take a half day off from work or set aside a few hours at night or on the weekend to take inventory of your current life.
* Write down everything you’re grateful for.
* Make a list of your accomplishments.
* Rank your current priorities.
* What is happening in your life that is not making you happy?
* What (or whom #majorkey) in your life is taking away from you rather than pouring into you?
* What do you want to do less of or move away from?
Once you have a firm grasp on your present, it’s time to go backwards.
2. Sift through your past.
Just today, I was listening to the Mo’ Money Podcast by Jessica Moorhouse.
She was interviewing Natalie Bacon, a former lawyer who quit law to become her own boss. Natalie said something that made me stop my cart in the Farmer’s Market aisle and pull out my phone to jot down the note.
She learned this from Andy Stanley: “Experience teaches you nothing. It’s evaluated experience that teaches you something.”

There’s value in looking backwards.
To see how far you’ve come…
To figure out how TF you ended up where you are – whether that’s a good or a bad place…
To see what you beasted and where you bleeped up.
What are the things you’re most proud of that have happened to you or that you’ve made happen?
What about those things you wish you hadn’t gotten involved in? Remember any wrong turns you made that led you down a path you don’t want to go down again?
Now, take it wayyyyy back to your childhood.
As children, we develop hobbies and interests, some that we become really good at. But as we get older, our creativity is slowly sapped away from us.
What were the creative interests you use to be really good at?
3. Imagine your ideal future.
Don’t panic. Even though we’re thinking of the future here, this step isn’t the same as figuring out your purpose in life.
Instead of trying to tackle such as existential question, let’s lighten it up.
Paint a picture.
Not necessarily a picture of exactly what you want to be doing in the future…
…but a picture of what you want your life to look like.

What do you want it to sound like? Are there children playing in the background?
What will your life taste like? Smell like? Feel like?
Physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially – what do you want your life to be?
This may sound like a very abstract exercise. That’s because it is.
Why is this exercise helpful?
Because if you can figure out what you want the outcome to look like, you can figure out how to make that outcome happen.
* Do you want to travel often? For work or for play?
* What kind of income do you want to be making?
* Do you even want to be making an income, or do you want to be married to someone who does? (Not judging.)
* Is there a certain sector that you want to work in?
Don’t stress over the specifics just yet. Painting a mental picture of what you want is good enough for now.
4. Write it down (vision board for your life).
Listen, if you ever have the choice to write something down or not, write that shit down. Put it on paper. Get it out of your head and on something you can look at.
Maybe you write stuff down because you’re more likely to actually accomplish it. It’s true. You’re 42% more likely to do something if you write it down first.

Mom brain, frfr.
So as you’re inventorying your present, sifting through your past, and imagining your future, make sure you write it all down.
Bonus points: it’s a creative exercise!
Think of it as a vision board, but for your life.
5. Connect the dots.
Once you’ve laid out a vision of the life you want to live, it’s time to put in the work. This is where it’s easy to get overwhelmed.
You don’t need to figure out the whoooooooole thing at once.
When I was little, I use to love doing those little connect-the-dots activities.

That’s one low-stress way to approach life. You don’t have to know exactly what the final outcome is.
But trust that if you keep connecting the dots one line at a time, your final picture will eventually come into view.
So ask yourself: Self2018, what am I going to do today that’s going to help me get to Self2019, then Self2020, then Self2021…and ultimately, Self2040?
And then start doing it.
If you change your mind, that’s okay!
If you realize you hate the choice you made, it’s all good! Change it. Switch it up. Do something else.
Take risks. Do something scary (scary, not reckless).
Just remember to focus on that bigger picture and then take one step at a time.
6. Expect uncertainty.
Don’t forget that in the midst of your dot-connecting journey, LIFE is gonna happen.
Right in the middle of your pretty little picture.
YOU CAN PLAN A PRETTY PICNIC, BUT YOU CAN'T PREDICT THE WEATHER.
So get comfortable with the unknown. Expect it. Plan for it.
We all live within uncertainty, and no one has all the answers.
This process of figuring out what to do with your life takes trial and error while you figure out what does and what doesn’t work.
Lean on your communities and your support groups.
Your friends and family might be a great option, but sometimes they may not be able to relate to your goals.
That’s why communities like LaziMILLENNIAL exist. If you’re working on figuring out what direction you want to take your life in, you may find the best inspiration from your peers who are in the same boat.
Thank you for being open. honest, practical and humorous all at the same time! I haven’t graduated yet, but as a control freak, I’ve had some of these worries from before I even started university and I have friends that have graduated that could definitely benefit from this! I especially love the quote by Andy “Experience teaches you nothing. It’s evaluated experience that teaches you something.” – will be stealing this, just a heads up lol!
Visualisation is definitely more powerful than we think I’m something I’m learning more and more about every day! A great post! Thank you for sharing!
Haha, steal away! I’m so grateful you found this post helpful. College is a GREAT time to really self-evaluate and reflect on what you want from your life. I’ve added a Life Review workbook to the post (yellow box) for you to write down your thoughts as you work through the process!
YES!! Such a great post. I know I definitely went through a time when I so confused about what my purpose was. Especially growing up in a church where purpose was used a lot. I have always been one to write down everything and make plans, but painting my future really spoke to me. “How do I want it to look, feel, & taste?” I love this exercise. Awesome post.
xx,
Leslie / @hautemommie / http://www.thehautemommie.com
Appreciate your feedback Leslie! My church was big on “purpose” too. My pastor actually did a whole sermon series based on The Purpose-Driven Life. “Purpose” sounds good until you have to actually figure out what your purpose is, lol. I believe purpose can be revealed through prayer, but in the meantime, figuring out what you want your life to look, smell, feel, sound, taste like is a way to work through that process for yourself.
Girl! I’m going to have to bookmark this so I can actually take time to go through everything. I really related to that part where you said why people go back to school. We’ve been students our whole lives and we want to postpone adulthood. I’ve been thinking about going back to school, so I can have a way to get to NY because there’s a school up there I’m interested in. But really I don’t know if I want to go back to school, my mom and grandfather are very tech/analytical and want me to go back to school for accounting/business/science/tech and I want to do fashion so there’s a struggle with that too. But thanks so much for taking the time to write this. I love self evaluating so I’ll def make time for this!
Thanks so much for reading Zoe. I’ve been back to school twice – once for my PharmD (which was actually beneficial), and once for an MPH (which wasn’t). I ended up only doing one semester of the MPH program because I realized I was wasting (a lot of!) money…I say that to say: it may or may not be useful for you to go back to school, but the best way to figure that out is to figure out what the end goal is, then work backwards to see if that degree is necessary.
I’ve added a Life Review workbook to the post (yellow box) if you’d like to write down/keep track of your thoughts as you self-evaluate!
I’m guilty of going back to school, that’s where i found my purpose, don’t know what to do with myself. Thanks for this post, I’ll get to it, so i can do some exercises you mentioned
Thanks so much for reading. Lots of people pursue further education for good reason, but I think sometimes it causes others to feel pressured to pursue further education as well, when it really may not be beneficial for their personal journeys. I’m glad to hear you could find purpose through your educational journey!
If you’d like to go through the exercises, I’ve added a workbook to help guide you through the life review process. You can find it in the yellow box within the post!
I definitely struggle with wanting to go to grad school, but feeling that I only want to because I’m scared to enter the “real world”. This week I will work on taking inventory of my present, imagining my future, and creating a vision board. Thank you for this post!
Thanks for reading Ashtyn. I hope the process helps you make your decision! I also created a Life Review workbook so that you can write down your thoughts as you’re going through the review. It’s available in the yellow box above.
Loveee this. I graduated from university & struggled for years to find my calling. Eventually, I went after what I enjoyed doing vs. doing what sounded like a wise life choice on paper. :]
I’m so glad to hear that Carmen. Would love to know what you ended up doing!
I absolutely dread the question “where do you see yourself in 5 years?” or any conversation that will involve me talking about the future…I don’t even know where I see myself at the end of this month lol. I used to be super long-term goal oriented but now not at all. It’s both liberating and terrifying.
Lol, it’s interesting how our perspective changes over the years.
Good tips! Passing these on.
nialangley.com/blog
Thanks for sharing Nia!
This is great!! That point about evaluating your experiences is everything! Let me pin this so I can remember to come back!
Yes! I almost shouted in the grocery store when she made that statement, haha 🙂 Thanks for reading!
Expect uncertainty.. we always need to leave room for error.. some ppl plan everything to a T, and make no room for variances..
Right. You have to leave room for life to happen because it will! Thanks for reading 🙂
Omg, this is so true and relatable. I love the tips. I’ve been debating on whether I want to go back to school or not, and I do. However, I feel like when I do it will be for the right reasons. Before I wanted to go for validation and hope, but when you do take a look at your life and plan you realize you have the tools you need to be great.
Love this post!
Yes, Krissy! Love the insight. I think the key is – like you said – know what you want and doing it for the right reasons. What are you thinking of going back to school for? Thanks so much for reading.
How did I miss this? Lol this is confirmation to me! My life has currently been revolving around my purpose and although I’m convinced already on what it is, I enjoyed this post! Your blog is beautiful and I love how you word everything!
Thank you so much for reading Bree! So glad to hear that you’ve found your purpose!
This is such a woderful post, truth!! It took me a while to figure things out it took me getting sick not being able to go back to school getting a job and leaving that job to figure out the things I love where I started my own little beauty store getting over my fair and started my youtube channel and even doing fashion posts on my blog. Sometimes I look back and wonder what if i had just taken those leaps back then where would i be now, but at the sametime i hav to say nothing happens before its time. God is on time its not always our time but his time.
mssparkleandglow.com
I love that Kerona – “nothing happens before its time.” That is so true, and what you do in that waiting period prepares you for when God decides it’s your time!
Really great tips! I’m happy where I am in my life right now but I also dread the question “where do you see yourself in 5 years?” It’s like….IDK only God’s knows! Literally! lol thank you for these tips!
Yayy!! Refreshing to see peers who are happy with where they are in life, but that question…throw it away lol Thanks for reading Lauren.
Thanks!!! these are some really good tips!!
Thanks Joy! Glad you found them helpful.
I love this, this is exactly what I am going through with my life now post graduate school. I will definitely be trying out the review this weekend! Thank you so much for this post, very helpful!
So glad you found it helpful. Would love to know how your review goes this weekend!
This was a great read. I’m currently in school trying to get my Masters in a field that I probably won’t even work in because after doing inventory on my present I realized criminal justice isn’t something I care about. lol I loved this 🙂
Thanks Kristine. A lot of times we don’t even realize it until it’s too late. I hope you find what fulfills you!
lol I saw that return to school so many times (and thought they were doing it for the same reasons)! it’s great you provided tips for those who are struggling, though.
Thanks for reading V!